And yes, there are those who have so little sense of self that they need others to feel in the least way secure. This is not dependence but desperation.

Real dependence is at the core a mature character, someone who is strong and self-confident and resilient and yet humble enough to know he or she does not, in fact cannot, go it alone.

This is especially important in intimate relationships. Over time two people come to need one another -- not just for the day-to-day tasks and chores, but for something far deeper. Their very being together becomes a subtle tapestry woven from their individual identities into the "we" they become. That "we" cannot thrive without each of them investing heartfully into what they each have chosen to create.

As your relationship becomes significant to you, you need your partner. You depend upon your partner. And in so doing, who you are becomes a composite of each of you individually as well as the couple, the "we" you also are.

The climactic moment of the film, "Jerry McGuire," Tom Cruise says to Rene Zellwieger "You complete me." There is a real truth to that line. We do complete one another, even though we may not be able to articulate just how, and that's where dependence comes in.

To admit dependence as part of who you are is to add to the completion of yourself, because dependence is part of the very fabric of this life. We cannot survive without it, let alone flourish.

So -- how are you dependent upon the one you love? How is he or she dependent upon you? How can you celebrate the ways you need each other?....From...